Ye Olde Scriblets
Writing Assignment #1
Presented By: Isadora Porkpie
Love
Always, Isadora
September
13, 1992
Dear
Diary,
I can't
believe it's been two weeks since mom and dad died. I hate them. I
hate them for dying and leaving everything in my life so fucking stupidÉleaving
me all alone. Everyone keeps
telling me that everything is going to be okay but it's not. I wish everyone would just leave me the
fuck alone!!! I've been staying at
Uncle Donald's and I hate it. I
mean I know he's gay and it's not like I really care but him and his
"life-partner" Tim are so cheesy around each other. They are always making out and it grosses me out. Not because they are gay but because
they are so old. I think they are
like forty something years old and Tim has the funniest looking moustache. I wonder if it tickles Uncle Donald
when he kisses him. Yuck! I can't believe I just wrote that.
Anyways,
they had this gay guy party last night where they listened to gay music and
hung out with their gay friends. One
of the guys, I don't remember his name but he was wearing a cowboy hat had
brought his nephew with him. I
thought he was kind of cute I guess even though he had kind of greasy hair and
was wearing a stupid Metallica shirt.
Heavy metal makes me want to puke.
His name was Henry and he said he had some cigarettes so I agreed to
hang out with him. When I told him
my name was Isadora he kept repeating it in a dumb and really fake British
accent. It didn't sound British at
all and was kind of stupid but cute too.
We snuck some wine that I can't pronounce the name of to my room and
talked and smoked out the window. He
asked me how old I was and I told him I was sixteen. I don't know why I didn't say I was fifteen. He said he was eighteen and that he would
buy me smokes whenever if we started hanging out. I told him about the whole thing with my parents and why I
was living in San Francisco and stuff.
He told me if I hated everything so much that I should run away. We also talked about movies and it turns
out that we both really liked Wayne's World which is cool. I started to feel a little drunk and he
asked if he could feel me up. I
said I didn't care as long as he left me a couple smokes before he left. He tried to stick in tongue in my mouth
and pushed him away. He asked me
why I was being so prude. I lied
and said I felt like I was going to throw up from all the gay wine. I went into the bathroom and sat next
to the toilet. Then I thought of
my bestest friend in the whole world, Sarah. I haven't seen her since I was ten but we still write each
other. She lives in Portland and
I've decided that tomorrow...I'm going there.
Love
Always, Isadora
September
14, 1992
Dear
Diary,
Right now
I'm sitting at a diner near Sacramento.
I've decided to call my Uncle maybe tomorrow to tell him that I
left. He's probably too
preoccupied and busy with his faggoty life to even care or notice that I'm
gone. Henry gave me his pack of
smokes and I hope they last until I get to Portland. This morning I left the house really early and hitched a
ride here with this old guy named George.
He smelled like a cross between an old attic, cigars and cat pee. It grossed me out pretty bad. I had to hold my breath whenever he was
talking and I almost felt like passing out like a hundred times.
He was
really fat and had these red patches on his face. Someone told me that if you drink a lot of alcohol that
that's what happens. I don't drink
that much except for that time I drank like TWO bottles of Strawberry Boones
and threw up for like a million years.
NEVER again!!
Anyways,
George kept talking about how his wife had left him because he was a good for
nothing and that he suspected that she (the bitch) was cheating on him with
some guy that worked at the grocery store...some Mexican guy named Julio. He seemed pretty racist which really bothered
me. He told me he would take me
where I needed to go but I lied and said I was meeting my sister (that I don't
even have!) in Sacramento. Thank
god he dropped me off because it would have been gross if he tried to molest
me! I'm going to wait here and see
if I can hitch a ride with someone that's not George.
Love
Always, Isadora
September
15, 1992
Dear
Diary,
I am
writing by a campfire right now.
Wow, I have so much to tell Sarah once I get to Portland!! So, I hung out in the diner yesterday
for a couple more hours and was starting to get REALLY depressed. Then this small group of weird goth
kids came walking in. They looked
pretty cool and maybe around my age.
They noticed that I kept glancing over at them so one of them came
walking over to me. She was
wearing a long torn up black sweater, lots and lots of make-up and she had a
tongue-ring (which I know now, ha ha).
She said her name was Aurora and she noticed that I was sketching in my
book. "What are you drawing?" she
asked. I tilted the book towards
her so that she could take a peek.
It was a silly drawing of George being shot. I immediately felt really dumb and quickly turned the
page. She looked at me and smiled,
"That's disturbing, do you want join us at our table?" I said okay and picked up my things and
joined them. Sitting at their
table was another girl dressed in a black hoodie and long skirt and a really
really cute guy with long black hair and leather jacket. The other girl's name was Thora, she
was seventeen. The guy's name was
Dimitri, he was nineteen and was from Russia or France, I can't remember. His accent was so strong that I
couldn't understand what he was saying.
Aurora was eighteen. They
had a car and said they were going to camp out in Shasta and smoke some weed
and just chill out. Aurora asked
if I wanted to come and I said I was on my way to Portland and I wasn't
sure. She said that they would
give me a ride to Weed where I could easily hitch a ride tomorrow. I said okay. Thora seemed to hate me because she just rolled her eyes but
Dimitri looked over and gave me a goofy smile. We drove up into the woods while listening to a band named
Skinny Puppy they were really weird but cool at the same time. Then we built a campfire and Dimitri
lit up a joint. I had never smoked
weed before but I didn't want to say that because they would probably think I
was a complete dork. I started to
feel really strange but awesome at the same time. Dimitri was telling me about how his parents had sent him to
the states for a foreign exchange program and how he left school and hadn't
seen them since. I started to tell
them about how my parents had died and that I didn't even care about anything
anymore. I felt like I could tell
them anything! Except Thora who
blurted out that I was probably lying to get attention and that I was probably
a spoiled little rich girl and that I knew nothing about pain. Dimitri looked over and told me that
she was just jealous that Aurora was paying more attention to me than her. Aurora then took my hand and said,
"Let's take a walk." I looked up
at her face and she looked so dark and beautiful kind of like an evil
princess. God that sounded
stupid! We walked for about five
minutes to a little lake. We sat
down and she asked me about my parents and why I was going to Portland all by
myself. I told her everything and
I wondered why my face felt so wet and then realized that I was crying. Then it was quiet. She started to kiss my face and then my
mouth (that's how I know that she had a tongue ring!). I feel really weird about this but I
have to say that I really liked it.
But that can be my little secret.
A part of me wishes that I could stay here with them but Sarah is the
one thing that is keeping me going...
Love
Always, Isadora
September
16, 1992
Dear
Diary,
I'm now
in Eugene, OREGON!!!
Finally!! Actually, I am on
the train on my way to Portland.
It'll be just a little while longer until I meet Sarah and I can tell
her all of this in person! Aurora,
Dimitri and Thora gave me a ride this morning to Weed (ha ha!) so that I could
hitch a ride further north. Aurora
and Dimitri both gave me a hug goodbye and we exchanged addresses while Thora
just glared at me. God, I kind of
really hate her!
Anyways,
I sat at this truck stop in Weed and kind of waited around to see who could
give me a ride. My stomach was
kind of hurting from drinking and smoking a bunch the night before. I tried to imagine myself hanging out
with Sarah in her cozy room and watching fun movies to feel better. I hitched a ride with this crazy
looking middle-aged lady who agreed to give me a ride to Eugene. She was a Jesus freak and she smelled like
really cheap lotion. Like those
huge bottles of generic baby lotion you buy at Costco. Her name was Barbara and her hair was
died the most hideous shade of red and was fading into pink. She had on a frilly flowered dress that
you couldn't pay me to wear! She
kept talking about how God will not let us get away from our sinning and that
we were here to repent for our sins and that we were all basically evil. I started to feel strange about the
night before. According to Jesus a
lot of sinning was going on. But
why did I feel so nice? I still
really like boys though. I
eventually found out that she was attending a funeral for her son that had just
died. She also mentioned that the
family didn't know she was coming and that she had given him up for adoption
when he was born. Hearing
that made me less annoyed that she kept talking about Jesus and crap. I don't know why but right before we
had arrived in Eugene, I blurted out that my parents had died and that I loved
them because THEY hadn't given me up.
I said that I was living with two of my sinning faggot uncles, I had
just smoked weed the night before and that I was probably a lesbian and that
the most important thing was just to be happy with myself. She didn't say a word for the rest of
the ride and her face looked as if it were a life-less frozen piece of meat
that had been left in the freezer for a year and wasn't very happy about
it. But I was smiling.
Love
Always, Isadora